Whenever we hear stories of people who cheat in their relationships, it can be very easy for us to cast judgment and blame. We rarely ever give cheaters the benefit of the doubt because there is no justifiable cause for cheating on your partner at all.
We always see the victims as the ones who are in the right. However, we shouldn’t make the mistake of thinking that everything is just black and white. Maybe you would be able to empathize with the stories of these real women on why they cheated on their men:
1. “I just completely fell out of love with my husband.” – Laura, 30
“I had actually been married to my ex for more than a decade before I decided to actually cheat on him with an old mutual friend of ours. I just really wasn’t in love with him anymore but I wanted us to stay together because I thought it would be better for our children.
This mutual friend of ours had liked me for the longest time. He had always wanted the two of us to end up together but the timing between us was just never right. We settled for being in a secret affair with one another for the longest time. We have tried to break it off and cease contact with one another.
But these efforts were always short-lived. We were deathly in love with one another but we didn’t want to hurt the people we were married to. And don’t forget that we also had trust issues. I mean, how could you ever trust a cheater, right? However, I ended up just telling my husband everything when we got into a fight.
He was already suspicious of my infidelity but he didn’t have enough evidence to confront me about it. We made the decision to work things out between the two of us.
We tried to make it work but we just couldn’t find a way around our issues. And after a year of trying, we just decided to call it quits on one another. We decided to move on. I never got in touch with that mutual friend again. I wanted to turn over a new leaf and start fresh.”
2. “My partner never did anything to make me feel loved or wanted.” – Grace, 29
“I was in a very serious relationship with my boyfriend. We had been together for around 2 years at that point but the magic just seemed to fade away over time.
Somehow, after a year of being together, I felt the love and passion in our relationship beginning to fade. He stopped paying attention o all of the little things. He no longer went the extra mile to make me feel happy in the relationship and I felt like I was being taken for granted.
I just wasn’t happy at that point and I was feeling very unfulfilled, neglected, and unappreciated in our relationship. Back when I was happy with him, I never found it difficult to stay loyal. However, it was after that 1-year mark wherein I started entertaining the thought of exploring my options.
I actually cheated on my boyfriend with a guy from our neighborhood. He was an older gentleman and he had been putting the moves on me even since before my boyfriend and I became an item.
He was always so sweet to me. He paid a lot of attention to me. Perhaps I only cheated on my boyfriend as a kind of response to the poor way that he had been treating me in the relationship.
I say this because I was never really attracted to him. He was just really sweet to me. That was it. The sex wasn’t even that good. My boyfriend never found out and I guess I only really went through it as an act of spite.”
3. “In some weird way, I cheat as a way to make sure that I don’t get cheated on.” – Karen, 34
“I’m in my mid-30’s now and I’ve practically cheated on every man that I have ever been in an intimate relationship with. Why? It’s because I have trust and attachment issues.
I’m the kind of woman who is always great at the start of a relationship. I always know that I am able to conduct myself really well when things are fresh and new.
It’s when things start to get real wherein I become rattled. Whenever I feel myself becoming more and more attached to someone, I try to stop myself. I get scared.
I’m always so frightened of that emotional depth. And in some weird way, I go into a kind of self-destructive mode. I cheat on my man as a way of making sure that things don’t get serious in the relationships. And what ends up happening is that I find myself being single again. I always let my fears get the best of me.”