Should you be marrying this person?
Marriage is a big deal and it isn’t for the faint of heart. It’s only designed for those who are genuinely ready for a committed relationship. Those who are two immature to understand what it really takes to make a relationship work aren’t really going to be cut out for marriage. As harsh as it may sound, marriage is not made for everyone. Not all people are going to be built for those wedding bells and a life-long commitment. As sad as it is, that is the reason why there are so many marriages that just end in divorce or separation. It’s because there are plenty people who are getting married even though they really shouldn’t be. But who can blame them?
They’re in love with their partners and they think that their love is enough to sustain them for the long haul. But they’re in for a big and unfortunate surprise when they discover that love alone will not be able to sustain a marriage for the rest of eternity. It’s perfectly possible for two people to do well as boyfriend and girlfriend in a typical relationship and then find themselves crumbling into pieces once they get married to one another. In fact, it’s fairly common. There are plenty of couples who start out fine and then find themselves disintegrating after the honeymoon phase of their marriage is over.
That’s because these people don’t realize that marriage is a grind. It’s not going to be casual fun and excitement all of the time. They aren’t really prepared to handle the lows that come along with the highs of marriage. They think that marriage is going to be a steady incline in their relationship when the truth is that marriage is a series of ups and downs. But how can you tell for sure if your boyfriend or your girlfriend is the one you should be marrying? Of course, you shouldn’t let the fear of divorce or separation frighten you into not wanting to get married with anyone.
But still, you always want to make sure that you will be marrying the right person someone who actually gives you a fighting chance to survive the marriage. How do you know for sure? Well, there are a few signs that may indicate that your partner may be good to you in the relationship, but is totally unfit for marriage. Here are those signs:
1. You both don’t really share the same long-term goals and plans.
As far as the future is concerned, you aren’t really on the same page. You are both two very distinct individuals who have your own personal goals and dreams. If you want to get married in the future, it’s very important that you both share reconcilable goals and dreams; or at the very least, you have to make a compromise.
2. Your partner doesn’t really see the significance of getting married at all.
You might share opposing sentiments on the idea of marriage as a whole. You’re probably not going to want to get married to someone who thinks that marriage is unnecessary, foolish, and a waste of time. You have to make sure that both you and your partner want to get married before you start thinking of tying the knot.
3. You both share opposing sentiments when it comes to having children.
A lot of people will get married with the purpose of eventually having children and forming a family in the future. If you think that you want to get married so you can have kids while your partner doesn’t plan on having kids at all, your marriage might not work out the way that you want it to.
4. You have opposing fundamental principles when it comes to parenthood or family planning.
If you’re going to get married to eventually start a family together, you have to make sure that your principles on family planning are the same. You have to make sure that you are on the same page with regards to how your careers play out together and how you will raise your children.
I wrote a book on my own story – From Hating My Life to Loving Every Minute
5. You both can’t decide on where you want to live in the future.
Perhaps you are envisioning a future in a quite little town that is family-friendly and slow-paced while your partner is thinking of moving to the big city where everything is exciting and fast-paced. If you can’t see eye to eye on living arrangements, you might have a problem in the future.
6. You don’t share reconcilable financial philosophies.
Financial management is very important in marriages. You always have to make sure that both of you share the same financial philosophies before you get married. It’s part of being responsible adults.
7. Your partner is unwilling to bear with the hardships that come with marriage.
And lastly, you both have to know that marriage is not going to be easy all the time. In fact, it’s going to probably suck a lot. But the both of you have to be willing to bear all of those hardships if you are really serious about staying together forever.
Talk to me
Have you been in this place? Talk to me in the comments below!