I’m not really interested in the version of yourself that you proudly portray on social media. I’m not really interested in the version of you that you take so much time to craft and perfect. I’m not really interested in the parts of you that you place under perfect lighting. I’m not interested in the parts of you that have to be accompanied with a caption. I am not really interested in seeing just how skilled you are at wooing people. I don’t want you to be putting on me the kind of moves that you put on so many people. I’m not really interested in you being polite just for the sake of being polite.
I don’t want to see the mask that you put on just to get other people to like you; to make the people around you more comfortable. I’m not really interested in the version of you that you have to force. I’m more interested in the version of you that just comes out more naturally. I’m more interested in the parts of you that actually make up who you really are on the inside.
I want you to really tell me everything that makes you tick. I want you to explain to me in-depth why you love the things that you love. I want you to open up to me about your favorite songs and movies; the ones you just can’t just seem to get enough of. I want you to tell me about the things that keep you up at night; the things that are always just running through your mind. I want you to tell me about the many times that I’ve been hurt in the past. I want you to tell me about the many struggles that you have had to endure throughout your life. I want you to tell me about the people who have caused you pain and what you had to put yourself through to forgive them.
I want you to tell me about all of the times where you felt hopeless about life. I want you to open up to me about the moments in your life wherein you just felt overwhelmed by everything that was going on. I want you to tell me about the many times where you felt like the world had won and you had lost. I want you to trust me enough to actually open up to me about the many emotional scars and wounds that you have; the parts of you that you don’t really like to reveal to everyone else. I want you to really open up to me about the imperfections that persist in your life. I want you to talk to me about your deepest insecurities and fears; the parts of yourself that you wouldn’t dare expose to everyone else.
I don’t want to just be hearing you brag about your many achievements and major feats in life. Of course, I will always want to be sharing all of your greatest moments with you. I will always be proud of everything that you accomplish in this world. But I also want to hear about the parts of your life that are less than glamorous. I also want to hear about the many things that you’ve done that you have now come to regret. I want to hear about the choices and decisions that you made in the past which you wish you could have approached differently. I also want to hear about the things that have happened to you that you aren’t necessarily all that proud of. Because like it or not, these circumstances and situations helped shape who you are now. I need you to understand that I like who you are now – the real you. And I never want you to feel like you have to change or alter who you are just for my sake.
I don’t want to be in a relationship with an avatar of yourself; the version of yourself that you wish you could be. You have to come to terms with the fact that you are imperfect and that you have your fair share of flaws and blemishes. But I also want you to know that this is nothing that you should be ashamed of. These are not things that you have to be worried about. You shouldn’t have to be concerned with hiding these less-than-perfect parts of yourself from me at all. I have no interest in meeting the idealized version that you have of yourself. I have no interest in getting to know the version of yourself that doesn’t come with flaws and imperfections. I don’t want to have to put up with any of your efforts to conceal the truth. You are meant to be the way that you are at this very moment.